I would have paid $20.00 for a wet wipe... (The Lee County Fair 2010)

Turner started asking about "riding the swings" back in July.  Wondering when the fair would be here again.

We have been talking about it and building it up for weeks leading up to October 5th.

Tuesday afternoon I jetted out of school to pick up Turner, just as excited as I used to get as a kid when I knew it was "fair night" for our family.  We impatiently waited for Mark to get home from work and then we all loaded up and headed out to the Lee County Fair.  This is our third annual trip as a family, and I am so happy that we've been able to take a treasured family tradition from my childhood and continue to cultivate it in our own family.

If you read our post about the fair last year, you may remember that Turner really enjoyed some of the more "daredevilish" rides for her age.  (Like, someone might have been tempted to called DHR on us...)  This year we were afraid we'd talked it up so much that it might be a let down, or she might be more frightened now that she understands more about danger, fear, etc.

Oh, our baby girl didn't disappoint!!  She's still a daredevil!  She had a blast riding roller coasters, sliding on the giant slide, taking a turn on the merry-go-round and ferris wheel, and driving her own car.  (The car that Mommy and Daddy should have watched a little more closely before they let her get on...)  I am sure that at  times you wouldn't know who had more fun - Turner? Or Turner's parents watching her have fun!?

We normally go on the night of the "goat showing", but this year it was "sheep" night.  You should have heard Turner shouting "BBBAAAA" back at the sheep!

I'll talk more about the degree of our "redneck-ness" a little later in this post...but the first sign that we might be heading down that road is the excitement level that was generated by the advertised foot-long corn dogs.  Seriously - foot-long??? 

Absolutely NO exaggeration.  It was enormous.  And GGGOOOOODD. 

And then we had an experience that we won't forget for a while.  We are in line, planning to ride the ferris wheel next.  And suddenly things get quite dark and we notice the ferris wheel come to a stop.  With people still in the cars.  The power went completely down on one side of the fairgrounds - so there were still some lights from the opposite end of the field.  But it was quite strange. 

And this little girl cried REAL tears when she thought that the one ride she wanted to ride most was not working anymore. 

If you look closely, you can see a tear remnant in her right eye...as we are coaxing her to get back on a ride that was powered at the moment.  She's still staring at the ferris wheel, just hoping it will come back on.

And it did...and then Mark took the video camera in the ferris wheel with them.  Which I thought was cool, and I think it about gave my mom a heart attack when I told her.  All I can think in looking at this picture is - what were the people saying about us who could see me on the ground with the still camera and him in the car with her and the video camera?  I wonder why she feels like she should always be the center of attention?

When I saw that they had a bucking bull ride, I asked Mark, "How much will you pay me to ride that thing?"  He quickly replied, "All the money I have in my wallet."  I really considered it....but we decided to just let Turner have her turn instead. 

She got her first taste of disappointment caused by gambling...this game was basically color roulette - put your quarters on a color, if the mouse runs into the hole of your color you get a prize.  We lost 4 quarters and ended up with a little girl who didn't understand why she didn't win.

But she wouldn't even consider leaving until she picked up a duck and got to pick a prize.

Now, before you read on, please know that Mark and I readily accept the fact that many would classify us as rednecks just because we attended the fair.  Rednecks we probably are - and we are OK with that.  We did discuss that there must be differing degrees of "redneck-ness" and we aren't in the worst category yet.  That would be the woman at the giant slide who cursed at her 3 year old son, while wearing a Bama t-shirt.  But the story I am about to relay to you will likely solidify in your mind that we (specifically me) are more redneck than you thought.  We are OK with that too.

Here we go...

Last year we learned an important lesson about the fair - you can never take too much money!  We took $34 with us last year and between the admission and tickets we had no money left for drinks, snacks, games, etc.  So this year we took plenty of cash - you know, thinking we knew all the tricks of "how to have an enjoyable trip to the fair". We took the stroller to hold my cameras and our jackets, but for some unknown reason I left everything else in the car - diaper bag, wipes, germ-x, etc.    "Humility, humility, where art thou?"   

This year's lesson was different in nature.  Last year, Turner wasn't potty trained when we went to the fair.  I think we were in pull-ups then, but nevertheless, not having to use public restrooms.  (Public restrooms might be a stretch of a description...out-house might be more fitting?  A porta-potty would have been heaven.)
Turner has already said she "really has to go potty", and by the time we get in the bathroom she's really whining about needing to go right then....with 5 people in line in front of us. So we wait...for a while because it's kind of a mess and there are several people...
*And only 2 of the 4 toilets functioning.
*And the 2 that are functioning are only about 25% functioing and are spewing water all over the floor when you flush.
*And spewing water all over the one roll of toilet paper - which is located on the ground.
*And there's no soap, nor paper towels, for the one sink that sort of has flowing water.

In that split second moment, I am going to be straight up honest with you, I seriously, seriously considered sitting her on the sink and letting her tee tee in there.  It was SOOOO tempting.  And I kept debating whether I thought she could potty "in the woods". ***see below***  We decided to stay put and try to make the best of what we had - let's just say that I somehow managed to hold her clothes and body to allow her to tee tee, all the while the "water" on the floor is seeping into the bottom of my jeans.  Of course there is no toilet paper, so I carry her mid-air to the sink area and reposition her clothes.  And then can't even wash my hands.  Or hers.  (In the words of Leon Phelps..."Um, yeth.  That is disgusthing.")

At that moment, I would have easily given $20, maybe $50 for ONE wet wipe.  Or one squirt of germ-x. 

***Let me insert the answer to this thought right here - the answer is yes, and sort of no.  Later in the evening, I couldn't stand the thought of a return to the outhouse.  So, we did the next best thing.  I learned she's happy to drop her shorts and potty in the outdoors.  I also learned that, no, she cannot do it squatting in an effective manner to avoid spraying tee-tee like a water gun all over her panties.  Yes, we spent the rest of the night at the fair with no panties on. Turner thought it was hilarious enough to announce out loud - a few times.  Call me what you want - my daughter in her precious Kelly's Kids outfit dropped her drawers and teeteed in the grass behind some man's truck that we didn't know. The look on Mark's face when I rounded the corner with her panties in my hand and stuffed them in the cup holder of the stroller...pure hilarity!! 

Oh life is good people!  And way too short to take ourselves too seriously.  Memories we'll never forget.

Here are a couple of videos that will give you a picture of how much Turner enjoys the rides.  Just listen for the incredibly high pitched squeal - that's our girl!





And finally, no fair experience is complete without a candied apple. Last year, as I explained earlier, we didn't exactly know how much money to bring and we ended up with no cash in hand at the end of the evening. And I had to pass up my beloved candied apple on the way out of the fair. (Thankfully my sweet Daddy, who built my childhood tradition of fairs and candied apples brought me one the next week so I wouldn't go without.) Not this time!!  I had to take Turner to potty in the car and Mark started walking behind us. I quickly demanded, "I have her, you go get me a candied apple!" He kindly obliged and I ate the entire thing on the ride home.

Oh life is good.  Only 363 more days until the fair comes back again!